Posts Tagged ‘Gruff’
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Tags: I often ponder about the whereabouts and mindset of my good friend and acquaintance of the past 10 or so years. Gruff is the man responsible for teaching me everything I have forgotten over this period. We’ve done everything together… once I completely tidied his front room, and once he threw me down the stairs for a giggle. I’ve been on fire, force fed Viagra, been in various states of stupor all in the name of a good laugh and wouldn’t change it for the world…
On going up to his castle for a few drinks I discovered him sat in the dark waiting, bored and drunk.
“What the hell are you doing Gruff?”
“I was awaiting your arrival young squire… I’ve made you a video.”
Have a look at said video and ask yourself… what is inside the mind of Sir Charles Grufferson?
As I ponder endlessly through text messages on my beloved Nokia N95, far far better than the highly over rated N96, I thought I would immortalise some of the content received from beloved local character and ‘hero’ Gruff.
During his spare time watching Hannah playing with wires at the back of his TV set, with mind going all over the place due to driving fines, alcohol and what not, he often picks up his telephone and communicates with mine. Here are a few that were all sent on the same night, just goes to show that Bob Hope can cheer you up as the evening progresses…
Voyage life in traffic, risk & loose. Months ago, skipped to quick & now points make 12. I hate society, soon wheels of 2 only option. Will u collect me & take me on?
I love Hitler, at least you knew where you stood. Bring yourself or even better offer yourself to me. I need somethings flesh. God I hate rules…
9 and 3 make 12, want to buy a car?
Red, amber or was it green? Took my chances. Facists got me. My child smiles innocent of all ahead. I with my knowledge should know better…
40 years have taught me nothing of what lays ahead. Be ready my friend, be ready to challenge and fight for your rights, I will go down. Down deep. BASTARDS.
awoke this morn thinkin. I still think & try 2 do my best. Why should I strive to do things to help my fellow man. When nothing but shit lands upon my plate.
Babys taking milk, I drinking from the jar. Out to ponder. About to smoke from green. Give me a while. I bet the next message…..Positive x
Oh my God thats the good stuff. Left leg on tuber till I sank ale fork tried to pooh large ding dong. Stunted growth. Shat legs towards south. Put up x
Hannah is playing with wires behind the tele. What should I do?
I’ve just fallen foul of a chicken…Fell over the fucker !